The Most Perfectest Cheesecake Ever in the History of Evermore

I’ve done it y’all. I’ve made a perfect cheesecake and been warned against changing the slightest thing.

At the first suggestion that I might play around with my new cheesecake recipe, one sister said “No” in a tone of voice that brooked no arguments. From anyone.

At the second suggestion (who am I to listen to my big sister all the time?), my dad said “it’s perfect as it is”. Now, since my dad has never told me I made any food perfectly in my life, I just might go to my grave without ever changing one milligram of an ingredient. I’m wishing I had temped the ingredients and written down the relative humidity the day that I baked the damn thing, because now I’m worried I’ll never recreate The Most Perfectest Cheesecake Ever. What happens if I can only make it in the winter, when the temperature and humidity are both below 70? That’s only, like, 2 months of the year around here! I could die if I don’t have cheesecake before then, and then where would my family be? They’d be left with just a memory, that’s what. Well, and the recipe so they can make it themselves. Maybe this cooking blog was a better idea than I realized.

Anyway, perfection comes with a price. In this case, that price is your general health. Since, I’ll be the first to sacrifice my health and longevity for a piece of cheesecake, don’t feel tempted to eat any yourself – I can take care of the whole thing. You and your arteries are welcome.

The morning after Christmas, the grocery section at Wal-Mart was out of anything but the full-fat cream cheese. Ditto on sour cream. I haven’t calculated the fat grams, and if you do, keep it to yourself, because those numbers are not welcome here.

As for the first ingredient: that is most assuredly NOT a typo. There are FORTY ounces – yes, FORTY (sorry, I can’t say that without yelling) ounces of cream cheese in this sucker.




The Most Perfectest Cheesecake Ever, (stolen shamelessly from Recipezaar’s Bird- I added a crust, but that’s it, see the notes below for my nervousness while cooking).

Ingredients
Crust:

• 2 ½ cups graham cracker crumbs and/or vanilla wafer crumbs (I used a combo this time)
• 2 Tbsp sugar
• 1 stick butter, melted

Filling:

• 40 ( FORTY) oz cream cheese (5 8oz blocks), softened
• 1 ½ cups sugar (no Splenda this time, I went for broke)
• 16 oz sour cream
• 2 eggs
• 1 Tbsp lemon juice
• 1 tsp vanilla
• 1/2 tsp salt

Directions:

Preheat your oven to 375. The directions say to line the bottom of your spring form pan, but I made a crust and didn’t do that.

Lightly spray the bottom & sides of a 10” spring form pan with non stick butter-flavored spray.

Mix crumbs and sugar together in the pan. Make a well in the center and pour in melted butter.

Use a fork to toss and combine. Use a piece of wax paper to press the mixture onto the bottom and about one half inch up the sides of the pan.

Bake for 5 minutes – it will not be completely done. Put it in the freezer while you mix up the batter.

Now it gets serious.

I whipped up one block of cream cheese in my stand mixer, then added some sugar and whipped for a minute. Then I alternated the cream cheese and sugar until all of both were added, ending with sugar. I don’t know if it made a difference (the alternate choice being to dump in all the cream cheese and sugar at once), but dude – I’m not taking any chances of doing this differently. Scrape down the sides of the pan constantly while you’re mixing.

Add the sour cream and mix until thoroughly combined. Scrape down the sides while you’re mixing.

Add the eggs one at a time, mixing well after each. Scrape down the sides while you’re mixing.

Add lemon juice, vanilla and salt. Scrape down the…you got it now, right?

Pour the batter into the spring form pan and lightly drop it a half inch or so on the counter to force up the air bubbles. Do this about 10 times, turning slightly between each “drop”.

Place the cheesecake in a pan large enough to use as a hot water bath. Put the pan in the oven, and pour enough water in the pan to come up about an inch.

Bake for 30 minutes at 375, then reduce the temperature to 250 and bake for 2 (yes, TWO) more hours. Do not open the oven to check on it!

Remove from the oven and cool for about 45 minutes.

Put the cheesecake in the fridge and refrigerate for at least for hours, or overnight.

This sucker needs no topping, but if you must, I can’t stop you!

Notes:

This is not a cheesecake to be made on a whim. I barely planned ahead, and I had just enough time to squeeze this out and get it in the fridge 4 hours before dinner. I’ll plan on making it a day ahead next time, or at least first thing in the morning.

When I took the cheesecake out of the oven, it was still pretty jiggly in the center. I was worried it would run all over the place, but it set up beautifully in the fridge.

Despite the fact that it has a whopping FORTY ounces of cream cheese, this was absolutely the lightest, fluffiest cheesecake I have ever made. I can’t explain, I can’t tell you why. Fools give you reasons, wise men never try. Or something like that. Wait, that song was about love, not cheesecake? Well, I say cheesecake IS love.

Apple Custard Pie

You can tell when I have family visitng, can't you? It's when I start trying out stuff and posting about it. I admit, I've gotten lazy in my day-to-day life. Especially this spring. We bought a gas grill last fall, and for the past 3 weeks, I've been a grillin' fool. I still burn half of what I cook, but at least I'm using marinades so the char has a little sweet taste too it.

Speaking of sweet taste: This pie was awesome. I'd never even thought of an apple custard pie before, and then I ran across one at Recipezaar, and knew I had to try it. I think it may actually replace the Dutch Apple Pie for the foreseeable future for one simple reason: I used a graham cracker crust. That is so much easier than making pie dough!

The original recipe is here. Amazingly, I didn't change much, although I guess that's in the eye of the beholder.



Apple Custard Pie

Ingredients:

For graham cracker crust:

• 1 1/2 cups graham cracker crumbs (I used Cinnamon Grahams this time)
  
• 1/3 cup Splenda
• 1/2 stick of butter, melted

For Pie:

• 1/2 cup butter, divided
• 2 Gala and 1 Granny Smith apples, peeled, cored and sliced
• 1/4 cup Splenda (If I had used Splenda for baking, I would've cut it down to 1/8 cup)
• 3/4 tsp ground cinnamon, divided
• 1 cup sugar
• 4 large eggs
• 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
• 1ish tsp vanilla
• 3/4 cup buttermilk

For streusel:

• 3 Tbsp butter
• 1/4 cup Splenda
• 1/4 cup packed brown sugar
• 1/2 cup all-purpose flour

Directions:

Preheat oven to 300F.

Crust: Mix cracker crumbs, Splenda and melted butter together and press into the bottom of a 9" pie pan. Bake for about 10 minutes.

Pie: Melt 1/4 cup butter in a skillet. Add apples, Splenda and cinnamon and cook for about 5-10 minutes (depending on how thick you sliced your apples) until soft but not mushy.

Butter...Sugar...They sing when they're together in my pans.

Beat 1/4 cup butter and 1 1/3 cups sugar at medium speed with an electric mixer until creamy.

Add eggs 1 at a time, beating just until incorporated.

Add 2 tbsp flour and vanilla and beat until blended.

Add buttermilk and beat until smooth.

Use a slotted spoon to spoon the apple sliced onto the pie crust (leaving behind the sugary-buttery syrup. I know. Sacrilege).

Pour the custard batter evenly over the apples.

Bake for 40 minutes.

I had sprinkled some cinnamon on when I was struck with the urge to just get a fork. Luckily for my family, I carried on with the recipe.

Mix together the streusel ingredients until crumbly. Mine? didn't get crumbly. It got creamy. I have no clue why. So I just dropped it by spoonfuls all over the top of the pie and baked it for another 30-40 minutes, until the top had melted and formed a top crust.

It doesn't look like much yet...but just wait til I cut this baby open.

Also? Because the combination of butter, sugar and cinnamon can't taste BAD. So it doesn't really matter if it looks perfect. Because the inside looks like this:

I was lucky enough to have one of the last two slices for breakfast. I may make it part of my daily diet.

Choclate Mousse

This is months past due. I have no excuse, other than my old standby: I have a laptop and a short attention span.

I thought you'd understand.

So last year was the Year of Thirty. All of my best gals and I turned 30. Due to our parents various life-cycles (and procreative natures, she says as she pours wine to forget about THAT thought), it took a full 12 months to complete the cycle. The Bestest Friend turned 30 first (oh, she just dove for the liquor cabinet too!), and The Wee One completed the year almost exactly 11 months later.

I made this somewhere in that year, for one of our birthday parties drink fests weekends. I don't even remember which, but that's not important. What is important, is that it was ridiculously easy. I snagged the recipe from Baking Bites, so verily, go hither anon and check it out. Because someone - and it may just be your subconscious, but hey, that counts - will love you.



And yes, I know, her pictures are better. But I don't care, because I got to eat the results, and it has cured me of any photo-ability-ego I may have once had. Also, apparently, any grammar skills.

Dutch Apple Pie

My grandmother set a pretty high bar for apple pies in our family. And I can hear you out there thinking "so did my mother" or "so did my aunt's godmother's second cousin", and I know that you think you have experienced the best apple pie ever. But luckily for you, I've had my grandmother's apple pie, which gives me the credentials to tell you that ... well, you're wrong.

She tried to teach me how to make her crust a couple of times...but I was around 16 years old and was probably wasting time dreaming of my new boyfriend instead of soaking up her buttery wisdom. And really, with fruit pies...the crust is 99% of the battle.

One thing I'm sure of? She didn't ever use vodka in her pie crusts.

Six months or so ago, my mom sent me an article from her local paper talking about why you should make your pie crust with vodka. (Apparently, it is not-so-secret family secret that I look for reasons to pull out alcohol?). Last week, The Beloved StepSon asked for apple pie for Thanksgiving...and I just couldn't pass up the chance.

I did my best to follow the recipe - cutting it in half, since I only needed one crust - but she lost me at "place flour in food processor", since I don't own one. Have you noticed that all pie crust recipes tell you to use that magical machine? I was excited when Deb mentioned that she prefers to make hers by hand, because...that's pretty much my only option. Does anyone else have a pastry cutter?

Where was I? Vodka. Right.

Well, we haven't actually eaten the pie yet, but I made the leftover crust pieces into little cinnamon sugar treats (another lesson from my Grandma). And they puffed up when I baked them. I'd like to say they were yummy - but The Professor found them while they were cooling. And the rest is history.

As for making a good apple pie - I seem to remember reading once somewhere that you need 2 kinds of apples - one that will fall apart and hold together the other kind, which will be more firm. Since I had 3 Gala apples and 6 Granny Smiths in my fridge, I decided that I liked the way that person thinks.

But really - the key is butter, sugar and cinnamon. The crust is half butter (I used butter in place of the shortening in the pie crust recipe), with a little cinnamon. The filling is half sugar with some cinnamon, with eight cups of apple slices thrown in to give you a reason to eat all the butter and sugar. The topping? Half cup of butter, half cup of brown sugar, 2 Tbsp cinnamon.

The result?

Cheesecake Tarts

Is there any food more wonderful in this world than a good cheesecake? Maybe a perfectly cooked steak (that's medium rare, by the way). Or perhaps a fresh croissant, purchased fresh from a Parisian boulangerie. Even better, my mother's fried pork chops with homemade macaroni and cheese.

But none of those are things I've cooked recently, and since I have cooked some cheesecakes, we're gonna go with that. Okay?

Last week, we had a little shin-dig at work for a lady who's moving away. We all brought multiple dishes - and we had enough leftovers for two more days! - and one of mine were cheesecake tarts. (Tarts being a little more finger-food friendly than an entire cheesecake).

Like so many of my attempts lately, these need a little tweeking. They were a little too tangy, and not quite enough cheesy - but they disappeared, and that's all my soul needs to feel redeemed.



Graham Cracker Crusts:

• 1 1/2 cups graham cracker crumbs (I used honey grahams this time, but either will work)
• 1 Tbsp Splenda (or sugar)
• 1/2 cup melted butter (1 stick)

Cheesecake filling:

• 2 8-oz blocks of cream cheese, softened (I used fat free)
• 1/4 cup Splenda (or sugar)
• 1/4 cup sour cream (ditto on the fat free)
• 1/3 cup plain yogur (ditto on the fat free)
• 1 envelope gelatin
• 1 cup boiling water
  

The crusts:
Preheat oven to 350F.

Line 18 cupcake tins with papers.

Mix together graham cracker crumbs and sugar. Stir in melted butter, and mix until it's completely incorporated.

Evenly measure the graham cracker mixture into each cupcake tin. I did about 1 Tbsp-ish, then went back and filled in what was left. Pack firmly down into the bottom of the tin.

Bake for 8 minutes and cool completely.

The filling:
Pour boiling water over gelatin.

In a mixer, blend together cream cheese and Splenda until fluffy. Add the sour cream and yogurt.

Add the gelatin, and mix just until thoroughly...mixed.

Divide evenly among the 18 cups.
Refrigerate overnight.

French Silk Pie

My first experience with a French Silk Pie was a Shoney's special as a kid. The chocolate curls on top were always my favorite part, with the whipped cream underneath of them being a close second. The chocolate pie part was ok, too - But I was really in love with the chocolate and whipped cream. And now that I've made the real thing, I know why: the pie was little more than a heavy pudding with whipped cream on top. Good, but totally missing the point.

After trying out Nicole's recipe for French Silk Pie, I've decided that whipped cream and chocolate curls are optional. This filling is what French Silk Pie is supposed to be - light, silky, chocolately.

I've made two of these so far - the first one didn't have as much height as I liked, so the second time I added a couple of whipped egg whites to make it even fluffier. I also used a graham cracker crust - there's just something about graham crackers and chocolate. I wish someone would write a diet book that had nothing but chocolate and graham crackers. And Diet Mt Dew.

I used a combination of milk chocolate and 80% cacao chocolate because that's what I had in the house. I have enough chocolate for one more pie. I think I should make one soon so I don't get out of practice, don't you?

The leftover piece of the first attempt:



French Silk Pie

9" graham cracker crust
1/2 cup butter, softened
3/4 cup sugar
3/4 oz milk chocolate
3/4 oz 80% cacao chocolate
1 tsp vanilla
2 large eggs, room temperature (that's very important!)
2 large egg whites, room temp (ditto!)

Make your pie crust: There's a good basic one here. Make sure it is completely cool before pouring the filling in later.

Melt your chocolate: I did this in a glass bowl over a small pot of boiling water. Set aside and let cool.

Cream butter and sugar until light yellow and fluffy. Keeping the beaters...beating...drizzle in the chocolate and vanilla, making sure to scrape down the sides of the bowl.

Add one egg and beat for a couple of minutes before adding the second and beating for another 2-3 minutes.

In a separate bowl, beat egg whites until soft peaks form. Fold gently into the chocolate mixture.

Pour filling into pie shell. Press a piece of plastic wrap onto surface. Refrigerate for a few hours or overnight.

Immediately before serving, spread whipped cream on top, along with chocolate curls if you have 'em.

Notes: This does have raw eggs, which doesn't bother me in the least. I made the first one with pasteurized eggs, and the second with regular ones. The first pie wasn't as fluffy - but it didn't have the egg white either. And I haven't died yet from raw eggs. Yay me!

I was blown away by how simple this recipe was - the hardest thing was melting the chocolate. If you buy a pre-made crust, the filling can easily be done in under 30 minutes.

Blueberry Streusel-ish Cake

We drove down to a local place that sells blueberries today. The original plan was to do the U-Pick option, but it got hot earlier than we planned. So we just grabbed a couple of pints out of their refrigerator, drank some soda from their old-fashioned soda machine (glass bottles!) and headed home.

Then, I decided that it wasn't enough to toss a few in my mouth every couple of minutes and let the juicy sweetness pop in my mouth. It wouldn't be enough to have them on my breakfast cereal. Maybe it would be enough if I made a blueberry cake of some kind for dessert.

I looked up a bunch of recipes online, and, in my usual fashion, combined about 5 to make this (I don't have corn syrup, which my favorite candidate called for; I wanted to use either yogurt or sour cream...etc, etc).

The streusal recipe I found sounded interesting - much wetter than anything I've used before. "Unusual" = "Must Make Immediately". It was very sweet rich, but the cake ended up being not too sweet and very light, so they actually went together very well.

Oh, and then I went to get my flour and discovered that the weekend's festivities used my stockpile (we're talking a brand new 5 pound bag, here) of all-purpose. So i used self-rising, left out the baking powder I had planned on and halved the baking soda.

Blueberry Streusel-ish Cake

Batter:1/2 cup margerine
1/2 cup sugar
2 eggs
2 tsp vanilla extract
1 cup fat free sour cream
2 cups self-rising flour, sifted
1 tsp baking soda

1 cup blueberries
1 Tbsp sugar

6 Tbsp (3/4 stick) butter or margerine
1 cup brown sugar, packed
2 Tbsp ground cinnamon
1 cup chopped walnuts

Heat the oven to 350F.

1. Make the Batter: Cream together butter and sugar; add eggs and vanilla, mix thoroughly. Add sour cream and mix to combine. Add flour and baking soda and mix thoroughly.


2. Make the Blueberry Batter: In a food Processor, crush blueberries and 1 Tbsp sugar. Transfer to a small bowl and stir in 1/2 cup batter.


3. Make the Streusel: Melt the margerine in a small bowl in microwave. Add brown sugar and cinnamon and stir. It's going to be very pasty at this point. Stir in walnuts.


4. Grab a bundt pan and coat it with nonstick spray. Press the streusel evenly around the bottom. Pour 1/2 of the batter on top. Drop the blueberry batter evenly around the top of that layer. Spread the remaining batter on top of that. The blueberry layer showed around the edges of mine, which means I probably didn't do too good of a job halving the batter. Math was never my strongsuit.


5. Bake for about 30 minutes, until a toothpick inserted comes out mostly clean - a few moist crumbs are fine. Immediately invert on a cake plate. You may have to scoop half of the streusel out of the pan and put it back on the cake, but that's ok. Or at least, I think it's ok.

Notes: I think I'd go with a more traditional struesel topping - this was a little too rich for me. The Professor and the teenagers in residence thought it was great, though, so your mileage may vary.

Cooking With Mama #3: Nothing-Like-a-Mud-Pie

It was a late Saturday morning. Ma mère and I sat down at the kitchen table to decide what to cook for dessert. There were an abundance of recipes from magazines, newspapers, websites - you get the idea. We had options. Boy did we have options - everything I learned about "Hey! this recipe looks great, I better save it in case I run out of ideas" - I learned from my mom. We just may have had too many options, but it was a fun time picking it out.

One thing we learned? Pudding is not a good substitute for cream cheese. Here's what we started with:

http://www.kraftfoods.com/kf/recipes/recipedetail.htm?recipe_id=108697

Seeing as how I also learned all of my "surely, we don't really have to follow the recipe" habbits from my mom, though...we substituted pudding for cream cheese. It tasted good - not great, but good - but boy, it did NOT hold it's shape when we cut into it. Which is why you will only see pictures of the whole product.

Take my advice: Use cream cheese.

Nothing Like A Mud Pie

3/4 cup crushed honey graham crackers

1/2 cup finel chopped walnuts

2 Tbsp butter, melted

1 package (4 servings) sugar free instant vanilla pudding

1 pckg (4 serrvings) coconut instant pudding

1 pkg (4 servings) cook and serve chocolate pudding

1 tub whipped topping

5 cups cold skim milk, divided

Preheat oven to 375F.

In a 9" pie plate, combine cracker crumbs, walnuts and butter. Press into bottom and sides of pan.

Cook for 10 minutes; cool.

In a medium bowl, combine vanilla and coconut pudding mixes. Add milk 3 cups of milk and whisk to thoroughly combine. Refrigerate until set.

In a medium saucepan, whisk together remaining milk and chocolate pudding mixes. Cook according to package directions and refrigerate until cool.

Stir 1/2 tub of whipped cream into the coconut/vanilla pudding. Spread into bottom of pie shell.

Spoon chocolate pudding on top, and spread evenly.

Refrigerate until ready to serve.

Just before serving, spread remaining whipped cream on top.

Makes 6 servings.

Notes:

We had leftovers of both puddings. My mom - being a genius - pulled out her tuperware (rubbermaid?) parfait dishes and made a few parfaits. Being an extra-genius genius, she pulled out some gingersnaps, crushed them and made a couple of parfait layers out of them. I didn't eat one of them, but I'm willing to bet that was the second best part of this whole experiment.

The best part? Cooking with my mom.

Apple Cinnamon Cobbler-ish Dessert

A month or so ago, I had an IM conversation with The Best Friend:

TBF: Oh, I completely experimented with desert

Me: :)

TBF: I baked some apples
and mixed some of the cereal you gave me with blackberry yogurt and an egg
and put it on top and baked it some more
yummmmmy

Me: mmm
very good
TBF: yes, I had an inspirational moment
TBF: it was as if you had come in and taken over my body

me: lol
that would be frightening

As you can see, I am even wittier in person than I am around here.

A few weeks later, after many evenings of me yelling after her as she left to go home "Hey! I didn't get my apple dessert yet!", we finally remembered that she was supposed to teach me how to cook something. After opening and consulting with a bottle of red, we remembered what it was.

It was worth the wait.

Apple Cinnamon Cobbler-ish Dessert

Ingredients:

• 3 fairly good sized apples (of whatever flavor/variety you prefer. I want to try it again with some really tart-y green-y ones)
• 2 eggs
• 6 oz yogurt*
• 3 cups of cereal (any kind of flake and/or nut cereal will work, Think Nut N Honey, or Oat Clusters)
• 3 Tbsp brown sugar
• 2 Tbsp cinnamon sugar
• 6 Tbsp butter, divided

Preheat oven to 350F.

Lightly grease a 9x9 baking pan.

Peel and thinly slice apples. Arrange in the bottom pan.

Melt 3 Tbsp butter.

In a large bowl, whisk together eggs and yogurt. Whisk in melted butter. Add cereal and brown sugar, and stir to combine.

Spread over the apple mixture and sprinle with cinnamon sugar. Cut remaining 3 tbsp butter into pieces and sprinkle on top.

Bake for 35-40 minutes*, or until golden and bubbly.

*Notes:

We used vanilla yogurt at my house; as mentioned above, TBF used blackberry the first time. She's firmly on the side of using fruit-flavored yogurt. I adored the vanilla. Toss a coin.

The baking time is approximate, as we were too busy laughing and carrying on with our plans of world domination for me to remember to look at a clock.

We were both firmly on the side of "more topping less apple" here, but you could easily add a couple more apples to make it a more equal ratio. If you're into that kind of thing.

Mango Orange Trifle

The Professor’s department Christmas party was last night. Free booze, free food, and high-falutin’ conversation (seriously, the discussion on the philosophies of Bertrand Russell versus Ludwig Wittgenstein made me long for another glass bottle of wine). The annual party is always an adventure. And, it always gives me a really good reason to pull out one of my favorite dishes: my trifle bowl.

I do not use this nearly enough, considering that even a disaster looks like an angelic creation in a trifle bowl. I think you could layer cat food and bat guano in these things and as long as you topped it off with some whipped cream, it would make your mouth water.

Public Service Announcement: I do not use bat guano in my kitchen. Also, I would never fight my cats for their food because they would hurt me badly.

Hmm. Maybe I shouldn't mention bat guano when I’m trying to convince you that I made something worth eating?

Maybe this will make you feel better:



Mango Orange Trifle

• Sponge Cake or Angel Food Cake
• 2 Oranges
• 1 cup orange juice
• ¼ cup mango rum
• 3 ½ cups of sliced mango (I used frozen that I thawed overnight in my beautiful new fridge, but fresh would be even better)
• 2 boxes instant cheesecake pudding
• 1 pint heavy cream
• 1 cup half and half

Procedure:

Step One: Make the sponge cake. I originally found a recipe online and made it. But it was a complete flop. There was nothing spongy about it. In desperation, I bought an Angel Food Cake to use instead.

Step Two: Make the creamy-goodness:
Grate the rind of 1 ½ oranges.
Whip the pudding mix and creams until thick and luscious. Fold in the orange zest.
Take a wee taste of the creamy-goodness to make sure it is both creamy and goodness-y enough.

Step 3: Begin assembling process

Drain the mangoes, if necessary.
If you’re a feisty sort, get the juice out of your oranges.

Cut the cakes into 2” pieces.

Mix enough orange juice with the fresh squeezed stuff to make 1 cup. Add the the mango rum and stir.

Layer half of the cake on the bottom of the trifle. Drizzle with the rum/juice concoction, but don’t over-saturate.
Spread half of the creamy goodness on top of the cake.
Arrange half of the mango on top of the cake.

Repeat with another layer of sponge cake, rum/juice, creamy goodness and mangoes.
Sprinkle the remaining orange zest on the top.

Notes:
I made the cake the night before and thawed the mangoes in the fridge over night, then whipped the cream and assembled the pieces about an hour before we left for the party.

The sponge cakes I made did NOT rise, which indicates to me that I need to do some research on proper-sponge-cake procedures.

This is not low fat. It is not low sugar. It is NOT low carb. Other than the mangoes, there is very little in it that is remotely healthy. And those are the precise reasons that I loved it.

Oatmeal Cookies - Who says you have to follow the recipe?

The Professor has developed a serious addiction to oatmeal cookies. The cafeteria at his job has them 3-4 times a week, and now he believes that he can’t live without them. The cafeteria’s cookies are surprisingly good. But every once in a while they go too long without serving them, so he comes home and begs me to make some. I love it when he begs.

I took a Betty Crocker recipe and changed it around, since the two of us don’t need 2 dozen cookies. I pretty much just cut everything in half, except for the egg. And since we have old fashioned oatmeal in the house and not the quick cooking stuff, that’s what I use. Which means that the extra liquid from the egg is a good thing. I think. I’m also making these rationalizations up as I go along.

End result: Oatmeal cookies that are a little chewier than usual. And a happy Professor. And that’s all that really matters in my world.

Unless there’s a shoe sale at Belk. Then The Professor’s on his own.

Oatmeal Cookies

¼ cup Splenda
¼ cup packed brown sugar
4 Tbsp butter, softened
1 Tbsp butter flavored Crisco
¼ tsp baking soda
½ tsp cinnamon
½ tsp vanilla
1/8 tsp baking powder
1/8 tsp salt
1 egg
¾ cup old fashioned oats
½ cup all purpose flour
½ cup raisins

Preheat oven to 350F
Mix all ingredients except oats, flour and raisins until thoroughly blended.
Add flour and oats, and mix thoroughly.
Stir in raisins.
Drop by rounded teaspoons onto ungreased cookie sheet.
Bake about 9 or 10 minutes – they will burn quickly, so watch out!
Cool on wire racks if you can wait, or just eat straight out of the oven.
Yield: 12-15 cookies

Adapted from Betty Crocker’s Cookie Jar Cookbook

Coconut-y Cream-y Pie Type Thing-y

The Phantom of the Opera was in town this weekend, and even though only three of us went to see it, at one point there were over 20 of us in my sister's house for dinner. The large number is helped by the fact that all ten of my nieces and nephews were there. The weekend was loud. It was boisterous. It was also full of food, fun and the kind of happiness that only comes from spending large amounts of time with a loud and boisterous family.

Since my house isn't large enough to hold more than about 4.75 people and two cats, the family dinners are at my sister's house. But I get to make the desserts. And with this many people, I get to make more than one. The hard part is deciding what to make. I can spend weeks pouring over recipes. I made an apple pie for one night- but I didn't buy enough apples, and I baked it too long. I brought it anyway, to keep me humble. The next night, though, I brought two desserts - a coconut cream pie and a blackberry chiffon.

I'm still on the fence about the blackberry chiffon. It was a lot of work (I wanted it to be seedless), and it didn't have the incredible blackberry taste I was going for. The coconut cream "thing", however, was worth every ounce of effort. Plus a few ounces that I didn't use. It wasn't really a pie - there were so many of us, that I doubled my recipe and made it in a 13x9 pan. And since the pie was mostly made for my mom - who loves coconut and views meringue as a waste of time - and since I don't really enjoy making meringue, I usually do this without all the fru-fru on top.
This pie takes a lot of wrist action. But it is worth every bit of it. It's a great recipe to get those whisking muscles into shape. It seems like every step takes twice as long as you think it will, because you just keep whisking, and whisking, and whisking...

Coconut Cream Pie
Crust:
3 cups graham cracker crumbs
1/2 cup Splenda
1 stick of butter, melted

Filling
1 cup Splenda
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1/2 cup cornstarch
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 14 oz can unsweetened coconut milk
3 cups whole milk
8 egg yolks
1 stick butter, cut into pieces
1 Tbsp vanilla extract
2 cups sweetened shredded coconut, toasted and divided

Mix crust ingredients and spread in a 13x9 pan. Bake at 350 F for 10 minutes.

Mix Splenda, sugar, cornstarch and salt in a large sauce pan. Add the coconut milk and whisk together until it's smooth. Slowly pour in the whole milk, whisking the entire time. Put over medium heat and whisk constantly until it's slowly boiling. This will take almost as long as it takes to read War and Peace. Remove the pan from the heat.

In a separate bowl, whisk the egg yolks until they're golden and smooth. Whisk about a cup of the coconut mixture into the yolks, and then add the yolk mixture to the remaining coconut in the pan. Turn the heat back up to medium, and whisk constantly until it's slowly boiling again. Continue whisking and boiling until it's getting a little thick, about 2 or 3 minutes.
Remove from the heat, and use a spatula to scrape the bottom of the pan. Add the butter pieces and whisk some more until the butter is melted and everything is smooth. Add the vanilla and 2 cups of the toasted coconut, and whisk some more until it's ... well whisked.

Pour the filling on top of the graham cracker crust and smooth a piece of plastic wrap directly on the surface. Refrigerate until it's set, about 5 hours or overnight.

Before serving, remove the plastic wrap and sprinkle the remaining toasted coconut over the top. Devour on it's own, or be really decadent and spoon some whipped cream on top.

Did someone say Chocolate? And Pumpkin? And Cheesecake?

I found this recipe in a magazine about 2 years ago, and it became the only cheesecake I ever wanted to eat again. Don't worry, I still devour any cheesecake in my line of sight. But this...this is heavenly. Angels actually start to sing when you put the first bite in your mouth. And those angels? Every time you make one of these and the timer dings, one of them gets their wings. Scout's honor. So make it for the angels.

Crust ingredients:
1⅓ cup Chocolate Graham Cracker Crumbs
¼ cup butter or margarine, melted
1 Tbsp Splenda
½ tsp cinnamon
4 squares of Milk Chocolate Baker’s Chocolate, divided

Cheesecake
3 packages cream cheese, softened
1 can of pumpkin
1 cup Sugar (I used Splenda, and it tasted great)
¼ cup Brown sugar
4 eggs
½ cup evaporated milk
2 Tbsp cornstarch
1 tsp ground Cinnamon
½ tsp Allspice
⅛ tsp Nutmeg

Crust: Mix these ingredients together and press evenly around the bottom of a springform pan. Crush 2 oz of chocolate into small pieces and sprinkle over crust. Set aside.

In a small saucepan, melt milk chocolate, stirring constantly. DO NOT BURN! Set aside.

In a bowl, beat cream cheese, pumpkin and both sugars til smooth. Add eggs, milk, cornstarch and spices and beat until well incorporated. Remove ¾ cup of pumpkin mixture and pour into melted chocolate. Stir completely and thoroughly.

Pour remaining pumpkin mixture into pan evenly. Spoon the chocolate/pumpkin mixture over the top, and swirl to create a marbled effect.

Bake in a 350° oven for 50-60 minutes. The middle should not be completely set when you remove the cheesecake from the oven. Cool completely and refrigerate.

Hint: the best topping in the world for this French Vanilla Whipped Topping, with a slight sprinkle of cinnamon.