This Dip Needs Help

Last weekend, my parents were in town. Becaue I'm an overachiever, I attempted to fix a "dippy type thing" for us to munch on while we watied for my sister to arrive.

It was not my finest hour.

I thought I had a Knor vegetable soup mix in my pantry. I didn't. But I didn't let that stop me!

I had sour cream in the fridge. I have a cabinet full of spices. I decided I could make my own dip.

Let this be a warning to you: "fat free sour cream" + "mini food processor" = "very runny dip".

I think the flavor was very good, though. Which is why I am imortalizing the process here.

You're welcome.

Sour Cream Dip That Needs Help

16 oz fat free sour cream
1/4 cup low-fat 3 Cheese Ranch Salad Dressing
2 Tbsp fresh basil, chopped
1 tsp garlic powder
1 tsp onion powder
1 tsp celery salt
2 tsp dill

I put everything in a food processor; I suggest you just mix it all together in a bowl - the food processor made the dip very runny.

My dip was very runny - as I've mentioned, I blame it completely on the food processor. I think it would also be awesome made with cream cheese instead of sour cream (or even half sourc cream and half cream cheese).

Experiment away, my pretties - and let me know how it turns out.

Guacamole!

It’s gotten VERY warm here lately. Last week we had one day that the high was only 32. Five days later, the high was 72. So you’ll understand my momentary madness when I had the overwhelming urge to make what is, to me, a very summery dip. Guacamole.

Guacamole is SOOO easy. Even if you just got some avocadoes and smashed the ever-loving heck out of them with a little lime juice, it would taste heavenly. Since I’m an overachiever, I added a few things. Since I’m a nincompoop, I forgot to take a picture. I actually looked at the empty bowl and said “Damn! I needed a picture of this!”

Now, I’m a little kinky when it comes to avocadoes. I like to hold back a little bit of the scooped out fun so that there’s some chunks in the mix. If you like it nice and smooth though, go ahead and throw it all in the food processor at the same time. It’ll still give you a momentary urge to turn your kitchen that awesome shade of light-green, 1970’s horrible interior decorating green that we all still have nightmares about. Or at least I do, and I wasn’t even born until 1977.

Guacamole

Ingredients:

• 3 avocadoes, pulp removed from the rind
• 1 tsp olive oil
• 2 jalapenos, sliced in half lengthwise, seeds and white pitch removed
• 1 tsp minced garlic
• ½ tsp kosher salt
• ½ tsp red pepper flakes
• ½ tsp ground cumin
• Juice from 1 lime

Procedure:

Saute jalapenos in olive oil until the skin is blackened. Put them in a food processor with 2 ½ of the avocadoes and the rest of the ingredients and pulse until mostly smooth. Roughly chop the remaining avocado and stir in. Serve with the chips of your choice. Or spoons. Really, it’s your choice.

Notes: a little fresh cilantro would make this a lot better. But because I’m forgetful, I forgot to buy any.
I really like this with some chopped roma tomatoes sprinkled on top. The reds and greens are both Christmasy and summery all at once – which makes it perfect for a week with crazy weather like this one.

Baba Ganoush and Flat bread

Baba Ganoush
Baba Ganoush
Baba Ganoush

It's just fun to say. Go ahead. Say it out loud three or four times. It'll make you feel better. It might also be suspicious activity that will make your loved ones look at you funny – but if you’re like me, you won’t notice because you get that look often.

I don't particularly like hummus, which is because I'm not wild about garbanzo beans. I am over the moon for eggplant though. And baba ganoush is basically hummus made with eggplant instead of chick peas. The eggplant I found this past weekend was predestined to be blogged about. And when I was about to hit "GO!" on the food processor, the jar with one big piece of roasted red pepper in the fridge started yelling at me to be used. So I threw it in the mix.

When I started thinking about making the dip, though, I forgot one important thing: Most people don't just eat this with their fingers. I needed flatbread or something. And I did not feel like going back to the store. Which gave me an excuse to try making homemade pita bread!
I was amazed when I took it out of the oven and it had actual little pockets – like real pita bread! Because, you know, I was so afraid of making artificial pita bread.

Now, I was lucky enough to have tahini in my pantry. I am unlucky enough to have a completely disordered pantry. So when I went hunting for the tahini, my incredibly graceful self knocked over a box of pasta, which pushed over a jar of something, which rolled a wee bit before knocking the tahini off the edge of the shelf.

The lesson I’d like you to learn: Tahini splatters.

Baba Ganoush: (adapted from: http://www.mediterranean-food-recipes.com/babaganoush.html)

• 2 large eggplants
• 3 tablespoons lemon juice
• 2 1/2 heaped tablespoons tahini (sesame paste)
• 2 cloves garlic – peeled and minced
• one very large piece of roasted red pepper
• ¼ teaspoon salt

Pierce the sides of the eggplant with a fork four or five times. Put the eggplants on a baking sheet and put them in a 350F oven for 45 minutes. (The original recipe says to turn them, but…um…I forgot).

Cut the eggplant in half lengthwise and scoop out all the yummy goodness inside into your food processor (yes, I broke down and pulled it out for this). Add the garlic, tahini, lemon juice, peppers and salt. Give it all a whirl until it’s nice and pureed.
Serve with pita bread

Pita Bread: (almost verbatim from here, because it’s perfect as is: http://www.slashfood.com/2006/05/27/homemade-pita-bread/)

• 2 ½ tsp yeast
• 1 ½ cups warm water
• 1 tsp sugar
• 1 tsp salt
• 2 cups all purpose flour
• 2 cups wheat flour
• Olive oil, as needed

In a large metal bowl, mix yeast, warm water and sugar. Let it proof for about 10 minutes. Add salt and about 3 cups of flour (whatever combination you’d like). Add the remaining flour ¼ cup at a time until the dough forms a ball.

I knead my dough in the bowl – I have a nice wide metal mixing bowl, and it keeps me from getting flour all over the counter, so I don’t have to go hunting for stray particles of flour under my microwave. Knead for about 4-5 minutes, until smooth. Place in a lightly oiled bowl, cover with plastic wrap, and let rise until doubled in size, about 1 hour.

Put your rack in the center of your oven and get your broiler going. Lightly oil a baking sheet.

Punch the dough down and divide it into about 10 pieces (I roughly shaped it into a log and then used a steak knife to cut it into 9 pieces that were about the same size).

Form dough into balls, and cover with a dish towel. Leave to rest for about 10 minutes.
Roll balls into disks that are about 1/8” thick. (I have no clue how thick mine were, but they were probably more like ¼”).

Place 2-3 disks on a baking sheet and broil for about 2 minutes per side. Watch them – as soon as you turn your back, they WILL burn.

Remove from pan and let them cool between kitchen towels (it holds the moisture in). Once cool, store in an airtight container.

Here's a shot of them vey close to finished while baking:

And here's a shot proving that there are actual little bitty pockets deep in there (yeah, it's a horrible picture,but I was so proud of my pockets!):

OH NO! Green Tomato Salsa

Last week, I was all excited about my tomato plants being reborn. Then I found the scourge that is the tomato hornworm running a refugee camp in my plants. So I hurriedly harvested the green tomatoes, because I certainly wasn't going to let the dratted worms have all the fun. If they can eat my underripe fruit, then by golly so can I.

The only problem is...I have never made anything with green tomatoes. I've eaten fried green tomatoes. I've even watched part of the movie on TV. But I wasn't sure about breading and deep frying sliced roma tomatoes. Very small, immature roma tomatoes. And my hazy memories of the movie provided no inspiration at all

So I poked around the internets, and found some salsa recipes that I liked. And then, I promptly ignored the basket of green tomatoes and itty bitty onions (that I forgot I planted and found growing around my tomatoes) for about 4 days.


That was until I made the chicken stuff a couple of days ago. As I was cleaning up the kitchen, I kept looking at that basket. And then I saw the bowl that had held the paprika'd onion and bell pepper, and it has a little paprika residue all around the inside. And then I looked back at the tomatoes and peppers. And then, finally growing tired of my obtuseness, my Kitchen Muse knocked me on the side of my head with my iron skillet and roared "ROAST THE TOMATOES IN THAT BOWL, DIMWIT".

Being smart enough to listen to my muse when she starts throwing around my heavy kitchen implements, I promptly washed the cutting board and started cutting things in happy abandon.

Roasted Green Tomato Salsa

20ish small green Roma tomatoes, halved
10 very tiny white onions (or 1 medium), chopped
2 Tbsp olive oil
1 tsp paprika
1 tsp cumin
1/2 tsp ground red pepper
1/2 tsp ground chipotle pepper

*note - The Professor does NOT like spicy things, and I do. So I always start off pretty mild and then divide the salsa, spicing up my portion afterwards.

Preheat oven to 250F.

Put tomatoes and onions in an oven-safe bowl. In a separate bowl, mix olive oil, cumin, chiptle and red peppers. Pour over the tomatoes and onions, and stir to coat. Put in the oven, uncovered, for about an hour or until the tomato skins are shriveling. I love the taste of shrivelled tomato skins. mmm....where was I ?

Remove from the oven, and set to work with your potato masher. Or, if you like using your food processor, do that. I just hate to clean the damn thing. But I ended up getting it out because The Professor likes smooth salsas. Taste as you mash, and add more spices as you like. The Professor's portion of this was perfect for him, but I added another dash of each the red and chipotle peppers.

This salsa was completely unplanned, and since I was too lazy to go to the store and spend the $1 on fresh peppers, I just used what I had in my spice cabinet. But I'm going to try this next year, when I will hopefully have a little more motivation to use real peppers.